“To reclaim the essential facets of your sexual health, it's time to affirm pleasure as your birthright, not an after thought. The further you step into your self-worth, inclusive of pleasure, the more solid you'll feel in your autonomy.”
Dr Holly Richmond
Dearest Muse,
This week, we explore pleasure.
In the spirit of the late great Dr Ruth who passed just last year, on July 12.
This week's affirmation is…
I Deserve Pleasure
Je Mérite Du Plaisir
Today is the day to stop pushing aside our own needs and desires, and prioritize pleasure.
I've curated a selection of resources to inspire and guide you on this journey.
Enjoy with week's newsletter!
*All photos are links to more information. The bookshop.org link is an affiliate link
Let's begin this week with one of my favorite artists, Janelle Monae
THE COMPLETE AGE OF PLEASURE SET LIST
In Monáe's world pleasure means some obvious things — material comfort, self-love, carefully maintained ties with intimates and an open-ended approach to alluring strangers
Next, our podcast selections
Some of the best podcasts discussing pleasure, sex, love, and relationships with others and oneself
A pleasurable reminder that simple pleasures all throughout the day matter
5 WAYS TO FEEL PLEASURE RIGHT NOW
Five quick and easy "pleasure breaks" that can be done in most places in 5 minutes or less.
If you have time for only one, choose the sense that you feel the least connected to.
The more you practice sensing and feeling pleasure, the easier and stronger it will become.
Now ladies and femmes, let's get in formation
WHY WOMEN SHOULD MAKE PLEASURE A PRIORITY: TIPS FROM INTIMACY COACH MICHAELA BOEHM
Prioritizing pleasure often falls to the bottom of the to-do list, because women simply don’t know how or are dealing with past negative sexual experiences
Hopefully, the ideas presented here can be a supportive starting point to experiencing more pleasure and turn on in your life
We continue learning, and getting back in touch with your pleasure, with an amazing book by intimacy expert from Michaela Boehm
THE WILD WOMAN'S WAY BY MICHAELA BOEHM
In this life-changing book, intimacy expert and counselor Michaela Boehm shares practical rituals and exercises to show you simple, everyday changes that will revolutionize your connection to yourself, your life, and your relationships
Finally.... our selections are a film and a series inspired by the film
SHE'S GOTTA HAVE IT - 1986 STARRING TRACY CAMILLA JOHNS
She’s Gotta Have It is a raw and messy masterpiece that features a non-conventional storytelling structure, sensual cinematography, and an overall perspective on sexual politics that still feels like a shock to the system thirty years later.
The title of the film suggests a bawdy mockery of female promiscuity, but this couldn't be further from the truth, as director Spike Lee, in his debut film, has sincere respect and love for his lusty protagonist, never making her the butt of a joke and always giving her voice and agency.
A RITUAL FOR A PLEASURE-FILLED WEEK
A slow ritual to reawaken the senses, reconnect with your body, and reclaim softness as sacred.
INDULGE IN A SMALL DELIGHT - A piece of dark chocolate, and amazing summer fruit, an iced cocktail or warm tea. Savor it slowly. No distractions.
MASSAGE YOUR SKIN - Warm a body oil (or lotion) between your hands. Begin with your feet and slowly move upward, massaging as you go. Name each body part in your mind as you care for it. “I deserve pleasure in my legs, in my belly, in my arms…” Linger on places you normally rush through or avoid.
SLOW DANCE ANYONE? - Light your affirmation candle. Soften the lighting. Put on music that moves your hips without permission. Let your body guide you: stretch, sway, dance freely. No choreography. Just curiosity. Let pleasure—not performance—lead. If you don’t want to dance, lie down with one hand over your heart, one on your belly, and simply breathe.
You deserve a life that feels good.
You deserve softness and sweetness.
You deserve to say yes to desire—and no to burnout.
So take the long bath. Light a candle. Laugh until your ribs hurt.
You'll be hearing more from me soon. Promise.
Tamara Charese
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